Two funnies

[rfm]

Three rednecks were working up on a cell phone tower:

Cooter, Ronnie and Donnie.

As they start their descent, Cooter slips, falls off the

tower and is killed instantly. As the ambulance takes the body away,

Ronnie says, 'Well, shucks, someone should go and tell his wife.

Donnie says, 'OK, I'm pretty good at that sensitive stuff, I'll do it.'

Two hours later, he comes back carrying a case of Budweiser.

Ronnie says, 'Where did you get that beer, Donnie?'

'Cooter's wife gave it to me,' Ronnie replies.

'That's unbelievable, you told the lady her husband was dead and

she gave you beer?' 'Well, not exactly', Donnie says.

'When she answered the door, I said to her, "you must be Cooter's widow."

She said, 'You must be mistaken. I'm not a widow.' Then I said,

'I'll bet you a case of Budweiser you are.'

You know, Rednecks are good at sensitive stuff.

********************************************************************************

**********************************************

Two couples were playing poker

one evening. Jim accidentally dropped some cards on the floor. When he

bent down under the table to pick them up, he noticed Bob's wife, Sue

wasn't wearing any underwear under her dress! Shocked by this, Jim upon

trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the table and emerged

red-faced.

Later, Jim went to the kitchen to get some

refreshments. Bob's wife followed and asked, 'Did you see anything that

you like under there?'

Surprised by her

boldness, Jim admitted that, well, indeed he

did.

She said, 'Well, you can have it

but it will cost you $500....'

After taking a minute or

two to assess the financial and moral costs of this offer, Jim confirmed

that he was interested.

Sue told him that since her husband

Bob worked Friday afternoons and Jim didn't, Jim should be at her house

around 2 p.m. Friday afternoon.

When Friday rolled around,

Jim showed up at Bob's house at 2 p.m. sharp and after paying Sue the

agreed sum of $500 - they went to the bedroom and closed

their transaction, as agreed.

Jim quickly dressed and

left.

As usual, Bob came home from work at 6 p.m. And

upon arriving, asked his wife: 'Did Jim come by the house this

afternoon?'

With a lump in her throat Sue answered 'Why yes,

he did stop by for a few minutes this afternoon.' Her heart nearly

skipped a beat when her husband curtly asked, 'And did he give you

$500?'

Sue, using her best poker face, replied, 'Well, yes,

in fact he did give me $500.'

Bob, with a satisfied look on

his face, surprised his wife by saying, 'He came by the office this

morning and borrowed $500 from me. He promised he'd stop by our house

this afternoon on his way home and pay me

back.'

[Greasemonkey]

GREAT STUFF!!! :rofl: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[coldsmoke1]

:D :lol:

[revct1]

Way too funny!!!

Who thinks of these things? Is there a bit of truth in it?

:D